Counted Blessings

“You always want what you can’t have.”

I’ve heard this saying too many times before, but it has never rung more true than now. Of all the accomplishments I’ve achieved in my life, I can honestly say I’ve never come across a barrier so great that it has prevented me from reaching my goals.

Sure, there are the common challenges people face such as laziness, money, temporary circumstance or self-doubt, but to me, those are mostly just excuses or short stops before getting to where you want to be.

From the time I got married, I’ve waffled over the idea of having kids. Though, with each year that passes, I grow closer to not only wanting kids, but being ready for them. And now, I can say with 100% certainty that I’m on board with the idea and potential reality of becoming a parent.

There’s only one problem: my body isn’t. Because of my beloved illness (total sarcasm), I’m almost always on some kind of medication—the kind you can’t take if you’re hoping to get pregnant. And there’s a chance I may never go off of said medications or into a state of remission.

Just this past week, my best friend had a healthy and beautiful baby. I am SO happy for her and her husband, but this joyous occasion served as a strong reminder that I want to be more than an Auntie one day. Not necessarily tomorrow, or even in the next year, but soon enough.

I’m pretty lucky to live in an age where there are plenty of options and counselling supports. I don’t necessarily have to have a baby the traditional way, which is great! But I still have an issue with the fact that a disease, Ulcerative Colitis to be specific, is dictating my plans for the future.

I encourage all of you wonderful parents (or soon-to be parents) out there to take a moment and count your blessings. Because it really is a gift to be able to have, love and care for a child.

baby hands


3 thoughts on “Counted Blessings

  1. Thanks Paige, it’s always a good reminder to count our blessings. I hope everything works out for you — you and John will make wonderful parents someday! We had some setbacks and heartbreak on our way to becoming parents and that makes us all the more grateful for our precious baby boy.

  2. Another very well written and insightful article Paige. So happy for your friends Natalie and Sam–is the baby a girl or boy?

  3. What a nice article. I hope someday you will get that child. You would be a wonderful Mother.
    Sometimes God has the most wonderful present for you. I hope it happens soon.
    Best wishes, Jeanne Edwards an Alaskan/Hawaiian friend

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