You know that gross curl you get in the pit of your stomach when you’ve been through a really bad break-up? That anxiety that seems to last for days on end? Yeah. That’s how I’m feeling at the moment.
Except, the difference is that it has nothing to do with my husband. In fact, his overwhelming love and support, along with that of my close friends and family, is about the only thing that’s keeping me going.
It’s hard to notice you’re in a toxic relationship, of any kind, until you’ve left it. And it’s even more difficult to realize that you’re unhappy until you’ve been freed from that person who has been making you so miserable.
The signs have been there all along. For months, all I’ve been talking about (indirectly) is this person, and how frustrated I’ve been feeling as a result of our interactions. Yet, I’ve tried to hold onto something that clearly wasn’t working, and that was causing me unhealthy and unwarranted amounts of stress.
At the end of the day, your worth should never be defined by another person, place or thing. You should be strong enough on the inside to ward off any darts that get thrown your way. You should accept no less than the full respect you deserve. And you should be able to move on, when you know there is something or someone far better for you out there.
So, that’s exactly what I’m doing. I’m moving on. As impossible as it seems, I’m picking up the broken pieces and putting them back together. Here’s my toast to new beginnings, and to making life the best it can be.